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ozmium
Advanced Member
    

 United States
521 posts Joined: Jun, 2008
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Posted - 2009/07/19 : 22:11:52
http://www.4shared.com/file/119198815/fe36fc53/sandmans_dream.html tis one has some structure have a listen tell me what you think i take all kinds of constructive critisism u guys know that this is a little short tho the song took about an hour to make
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(= ozmium =)
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ozmium/ http://soundcloud.com/ozmium Co Owner of Hardcore energy. http://www.youtube.com/user/HardcoreEnergyPromo https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hardcore-Energy
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leham89
Average Member
  

 United Kingdom
217 posts Joined: May, 2009
59 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2009/07/19 : 22:16:20
tbh buddy i think it sounds a bit bland. it needs something else, a new element, something to liven it up a bit.
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-I WANNA TOUCH YOUR BASSLINE!!!-
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ozmium
Advanced Member
    

 United States
521 posts Joined: Jun, 2008
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Posted - 2009/07/19 : 22:18:01
i agree there somthing but i cant put my finger on it il update it if u can help me out some more
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(= ozmium =)
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ozmium/ http://soundcloud.com/ozmium Co Owner of Hardcore energy. http://www.youtube.com/user/HardcoreEnergyPromo https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hardcore-Energy
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ozmium
Advanced Member
    

 United States
521 posts Joined: Jun, 2008
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Posted - 2009/07/20 : 08:17:02
BUMP*
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(= ozmium =)
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ozmium/ http://soundcloud.com/ozmium Co Owner of Hardcore energy. http://www.youtube.com/user/HardcoreEnergyPromo https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hardcore-Energy
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Meathead
Advanced Member
    

 United Kingdom
4,217 posts Joined: Sep, 2006
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Posted - 2009/07/20 : 23:13:29
quote: Originally posted by ozmium:
http://www.4shared.com/file/119198815/fe36fc53/sandmans_dream.html tis one has some structure have a listen tell me what you think i take all kinds of constructive critisism u guys know that this is a little short tho the song took about an hour to make
It doesn't. It also doesn't have a bassline? It's just a pretty poor synth playing a riff over a kick drum with a few claps (not on the right beat) thrown in. Maybe spending more than an hour on a tune would be a good place to start. Oh and wrong section.
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"Music creates order out of chaos; for rhythm imposes unanimity upon the divergent, melody imposes continuity upon the disjointed, and harmony imposes compatibility upon the incongruous." -Sir Yehudi Menuhin
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acidfluxxbass
Advanced Member
    

 United Kingdom
5,000 posts Joined: Apr, 2008
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Posted - 2009/07/20 : 23:26:44
yeah, sorry mate, not great.
1. wrong forum section, again!!
2. i sent you my perception of a hardcore structure, and this doesnt follow it..
i. you've started with the melody, which is generally wrong
ii. its 1.12 minutes... there's no room for any structure or variance..
iii. remember what I said, I even gave how many bars are recommended for each section of the song.
iv. it fades out at the end..
v. you claim to be a DJ, so you should generally know hardcore structures and the meaning of the word.
3. the song is very bland.
i. if this were a full length track, and this is what it contained, you'd have trouble. there needs to be some variance, perhaps some breaks somewhere, a breakdown.. etc
ii. the melody seems to loop every 4 bars without much variance. the melody is then continued in different sounds.
iii. there is no bass. the bassline is heard int he melody, but you need something seperate to add to the low end.
4. no sign of mastering or a mix down.
i. the claps and hats are allot louder than the kick
ii. in the filter at the start, the volume rises allot, compared to the unfiltered melody
iii. the genre, i assume is jumpstyle, yet the kick is barely hearable.
iv. no low end, as i mentioned.
5. just an hour on the tune? take things more seriously. slow yourself down a bit. its better to release something comparable to professional stuff rather than throwing out junk.. I've learnt that much. Its always best to get first individual opinions, perhaps on msn.
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Aka Archefluxx
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Edited by - acidfluxxbass on 2009/07/20 23:27:25 |