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Hardcore4eva
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,518 posts
Joined: Jun, 2004
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 Posted - 2006/08/16 : 07:39:47
**Edit this one is better**
>> 1. Under no circumstances may two men share an
>> umbrella, unless at the
>> footy, and your pies are getting wet, then for the
>> eating period only it
>> is permissible.
>>
>> 2. It is ok for a man to cry under the following
>> circumstances:- a. The
>> moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
>> b. After wrecking your boss' car.
>>
>> 3. Any man who brings a camera to a stag night may
>> be legally killed and
>> eaten by his mates.
>>
>> 4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you
>> must bail a friend out
>> of jail within 12 hours.
>>
>> 5. If you've known a bloke for more than 24 hours,
>> his sister is off
>> limits forever, unless you actually marry her.
>>
>> 6. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a mate's
>> fridge is forbidden.
>> However, complain at will if the temperature is
>> unsuitable.
>>
>> 7. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday
>> present for another
>> man.
>> In fact, even remembering
>> your mate's birthday is strictly optional.
>>
>> 8. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines
>> pit stops, not the
>> weakest.
>>
>> 9. When stumbling upon other blokes watching a
>> sporting event, you may
>> ask the score of the game in progress, but you may
>> never ask who's
>> playing.
>>
>> 0. It is permissible to quaff a fruity alcopop drink
>> only when you're
>> sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by
>> a topless
>> supermodel...and it's free.
>>
>> 11. Only in situations of moral and/or physical
>> peril are you allowed to
>> kick another bloke in the nuts.
>>
>> 12. Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever.
>> Issue closed.
>>
>> 13. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must
>> be treated as spies
>> until they demonstrate knowledge of the game (can
>> explain offside or
>> LBW)and the ability to drink as much as the other
>> sports watchers.
>>
>> 14. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the
>> last slice of
>> pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
>>
>> 15. If you compliment a bloke on his six-pack, you'd
>> better be talking
>> about his choice of beer.
>>
>> 16. Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing
>> a mate of yours
>> except if she's withholding s*x pending your
>> response.
>>
>> 17. Never talk to a man in the gents unless you are
>> on equal footing
>> i.e.
>> both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all
>> other situations, an
>> almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you
>> need.
>>
>> 18. It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is
>> not acceptable for
>> her to drive yours.
>>
>> 19. The girl who replies to the question "What do
>> you want for
>> Christmas?"
>> with "if you loved me, you'd
>> know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.
__________________________________
I think you have got me confused with someone that actually gives a FUK.....................
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Edited by - Hardcore4eva on 2006/08/16 07:45:29 |
Simon
Advanced Member
Belgium
5,001 posts
Joined: Dec, 2001
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Posted - 2006/08/16 : 09:26:03
Too right about the sport, there's spys' everywhere these days!
It's always all about the strongest bladder.
__________________________________
"...The Outsider"
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charlieee
Advanced Member
Australia
1,422 posts
Joined: Dec, 2005
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Posted - 2006/08/16 : 12:00:24
lol strongest bladder lol luv the one about a man is only allowed to cry lol
__________________________________
iv got a purple monkey dishwasher do u?
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Smoogie
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,504 posts
Joined: Mar, 2006
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 Posted - 2006/08/16 : 12:00:30
Had to laugh at 14! The choice of choosing the last pizza or drink is a tough one to make IMO...
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.
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jimbob squarepants
Senior Member
United Kingdom
476 posts
Joined: Sep, 2005
246 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/08/16 : 15:27:27
very true indeed.apart from the last one.i would rather have a playstation 3
Oh dear!! does this mean im really not a man??
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It's Alright To Rave!
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Sk8SiM
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,293 posts
Joined: Nov, 2004
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Posted - 2006/08/16 : 18:20:45
lmao... number 10 has me in bits 
__________________________________
DJ SiMUl8 Presents SiMPliciTy!
<b>To Be Open Minded... Is To Open Your Mind!</b>
http://www.myspace.com/Sk8SiM
Sk8SiM/Morrall Studios.
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-Bazza-
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,276 posts
Joined: Oct, 2004
18 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/08/16 : 20:05:59
Strictly optional? 
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Smoogie
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,504 posts
Joined: Mar, 2006
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Posted - 2006/08/16 : 22:05:06
quote:
Originally posted by charlie4u:
lol strongest bladder lol luv the one about a man is only allowed to cry lol
I think a man should also be aloud to cry if their fav. Football/Sport team lose the game of if they get 'somthing in their eye' I have got many things in my eye like the time I fell off my bike when I was younger...
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.
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ihaveduff
Advanced Member
Australia
944 posts
Joined: Apr, 2005
28 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/08/17 : 03:30:21
hahahahahaha very smooth
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Born to Rave:Live to Dance
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lucificifus
Advanced Member
United States
1,518 posts
Joined: Jun, 2004
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Posted - 2006/08/17 : 07:15:38
Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Unless they are
DAVID HASSELHOFF
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pump tha selectah!
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iluvhrdcor
Advanced Member
Australia
589 posts
Joined: Jan, 2006
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Posted - 2006/08/17 : 10:26:55
wot??? thats stupid no offence.
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HARDCORE IS WHAT BRINGS THE BEST OUT OF ME
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Hardcore4eva
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,518 posts
Joined: Jun, 2004
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Posted - 2006/08/17 : 10:59:21
quote:
Originally posted by iluvhrdcor:
wot??? thats stupid no offence.
well u are female.......
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I think you have got me confused with someone that actually gives a FUK.....................
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kathryn
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,520 posts
Joined: Apr, 2005
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Posted - 2006/08/17 : 12:52:52
Hahahahah! Speedo's!(12)
Now they are eye openers 
and David Hasselhoff thats a bit  get it? nuts! 
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:)
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leachy12
New Member
United Kingdom
56 posts
Joined: Jul, 2006
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Posted - 2006/08/18 : 00:22:48
made me chuckle:> haha
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HWND.
Anyone sellin any decent decks
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SixFeet
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
2,285 posts
Joined: Jan, 2005
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Posted - 2006/08/18 : 19:15:42
quote:
Originally posted by Hardcore4eva:
1. Under no circumstances may two men share an
umbrella, unless at the
footy, and your pies are getting wet, then for the
eating period only it
is permissible.
Real Men don't do brollies....
__________________________________
No single raindrop ever blames themselves for the flood...
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