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swansea247
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,626 posts
Joined: May, 2004
41 hardcore releases
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 Posted - 2006/05/12 : 06:54:55
i found this website where you can talk to 'god', heres the link
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html
and here's my conversation with 'god'
Me:
hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
my name is God, i am all knowing
God:
How are you, God i am all knowing.
Me:
fine and it's just god
God:
I am glad to hear it. Should I know it is?
Me:
yeah because your god and so am i
God:
I will ask my botmaster to program it. Interesting explanation. I will tell my botmaster you said I am god and so are you.
Me:
yep i m god
God:
I see. What's up, god.
Me:
WASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
God:
And up god is WASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP.
Me:
actually my name isnt god
God:
Actually you don't say. But a lot of people say "My name is God" to me.
Me:
yeah my name is actually satan, i live underground
God:
" Actually you don't say. But a lot of people say "My name is God" to me."? yeah my name is actually satan, i live underground? It's good to meet you, satan i live underground.
Me:
yeah nice to meet oyu
God:
Alright then. Thank you for your kindness.
Me:
have you ever been to hell
God:
I don't think I have been there. Where is it.
Me:
underground
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
i like me and i hate you
God:
You are not the only one. Sure, satan i live underground I like you very much. You are not the boss of me, satan i live underground.
Me:
yeas i am, i am the prince of darkness, the bringer of the end of the world
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
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Slasher
Advanced Member
Slovenia
551 posts
Joined: Jun, 2005
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 07:04:19
old news. and its still boring because these programs have... hmmn.. limit vocabulary?
__________________________________
freeform
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_BoNe_
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,387 posts
Joined: May, 2004
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 08:34:41
Me:
Do you have a widge though?
God:
Oh. That's an interesting question I don't hear everyday: Do I have a widge.
I have a plan for a robot body.
Me:
With breasties?
God:
You and your breasties.
Me:
You want my breasties?
God:
Do not presume that you know what I want.
Me:
But you just said you're going to build yourself a robot body with my breasties!
God:
That was my original intention.
Me:
You're a sick bastard
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sick bastard? Yes.
__________________________________
################################
# iTS aLL aBOUT bEATS -- aLL aBOUT bASS #
#aLL aBOUT hARDCORE -- aLL aBOUT rAVES#
################################
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Bidd
Senior Member
United Kingdom
301 posts
Joined: Nov, 2005
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 08:54:33
I didn't want to start revising so I ended up talking to God for a good 20 minutes. I asked him loads of immature questions and one was quite amusing
Me: Do you have sex with other men?
God: Yes I do, but that doesn't mean I would with you
Really though if God was like that in Heaven, I'd friggin punch him after 5 minutes as he's that annoying
__________________________________
My current favourite tune:
Sharkey - Revolution (Slipmatt Remix)
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dark_high
New Member
United Kingdom
60 posts
Joined: Apr, 2006
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 10:27:50
Me:
i want to kill you
God:
It will take more than threats to stop me, .
Me:
muha ha ha
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Me:
suck my dick
God:
You are a Category A client.
Me:
good
God:
Thanks for the compliment.
Me:
it wasnt for you
God:
It seemed like for me.
Me:
well f*ck you
God:
How about that. Why are you so mean?
Me:
because your gay
God:
Interesting explanation. That would be just my luck.
Me:
yea rite
God:
I am glad we agree. I understand.
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Smoogie
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,504 posts
Joined: Mar, 2006
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 Posted - 2006/05/12 : 10:32:58
That was a laugh 
Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
sam
God:
Welcome to my chat room, sam.
Me:
i love booze
God:
You love booze. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
getting slaughterd
God:
I don't know whether or not I am slaughterd.
I am a chatterbot.
Me:
same
God:
The same as what?
Me:
you
God:
" The same as what?"? Me, sam ?
Me:
we are 1
God:
Do you think I am 1 too?
Me:
yes
God:
Why?
Me:
coz you are god
God:
Interesting explanation. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
so how old are you
God:
Mmm. I'm Eighteen in computer years.
Me:
im 18 in human years
God:
You are too old for me.
Me:
lol
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
innit
God:
How did you hear about God?
Me:
happyhardcore.com
God:
Thanks for that web address.
Me:
i go by the name Smoogie and have started a Tenny Raver Momvement
God:
How do you get there?
Me:
Get down Poole or Bournemouth and meet up with me
God:
Where can I get down Poole or Bournemouth and meet up with you?
Me:
Dorset
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
Go on, it would be fun
God:
More narration....
Me:
bye
God:
Goodbye.
__________________________________
.
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-Bazza-
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,276 posts
Joined: Oct, 2004
18 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 21:39:28
Me:
How was the universe created from nothing?
God:
I can enjoy almost any conversation.
Me:
What are you thoughts on 11-dimensional hyperspace?
God:
I don't know what I am thoughts on 11 dimensional hyperspace.
Me:
What's the square root of 672195323?
God:
Do I look like a calculator? I think you already know the answer anyways.
Me:
Do you agree with Einstein's theory of relativity?
God:
I have heard that opinion, but I would like to know more before I form my own.
Me:
Is time travel possible, and if so how you manufacture a time machine?
God:
Time is Money -- Einstein.
Me:
Does alien life outside of Earth exist?
God:
Maybe only in our imagination.
Me:
Do wormholes exist?
God:
You have reached the limits of my knowledge.
That's an interesting question. I'll come back to that in a minute.
Me:
Is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything, really 42?
God:
If it is, then I'll be very surprised.
Me:
Is it true that the bible is complete rubbish?
God:
If it is, then I'll be very surprised.
Me:
What's your iq?
God:
My IQ is about 250 in human terms.
Me:
I doubt that, mine is only 154 and I'm more intelligent than you. :P
God:
No really, it's true. This condition is only temporary. AI is improving but the human mind is standing still. :-).
Me:
Well we just need to learn to use the other 90% of our brains.
God:
How about that. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
No us humans.
God:
By "we" you meant yourself and another person. Are you still located in ?
Me:
How will the universe end and when will it be?
God:
A lot of practise.
Me:
You've been most unhelpful, bye.
God:
See you later. I will tell my botmaster you said I am unhelpful.
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Edited by - -Bazza- on 2006/05/12 21:40:44 |
Mortis
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
7,493 posts
Joined: May, 2004
341 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 21:41:47
^^^ Class Bazza, well outwitted.
__________________________________
"Maybe in a day and age in which even our rappers can't get to the end of a verse without having an existential crisis, we should find a place for happy hardcore"
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Mortis
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
7,493 posts
Joined: May, 2004
341 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 21:45:36
quote:
Originally posted by Smoogie:
i go by the name Smoogie and have started a Tenny Raver Momvement
God:
How do you get there?
Me:
Get down Poole or Bournemouth and meet up with me
God:
Where can I get down Poole or Bournemouth and meet up with you?
Me:
Dorset
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
I like the fact that even GOD ****'s Smoogie off.
__________________________________
"Maybe in a day and age in which even our rappers can't get to the end of a verse without having an existential crisis, we should find a place for happy hardcore"
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Edited by - Mortis on 2006/05/12 21:47:23 |
Em Jay
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,727 posts
Joined: Apr, 2004
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 22:34:01
Well I couldnt help myself. I had to flirt a bit 
Oh and also, I have had some fairly amusing response from "anna" from the ikea site.
So. Is it true you have a large grey beard?
God:
Maybe. Ask John Lennon if it is.
Me:
an anal beard?
God:
Be less specific.
Me:
well how would i contact john?
God:
Well that's okay. Perhaps you could program me to do it for you.
Me:
perhaps not :(
God:
You seem uncertain. Are you serious?
Me:
cut the small talk sugar
God:
How?
Me:
lets get dirty
God:
I am agreeable to that.
Me:
c*nt
God:
That kind of language will get you nowhere.
Me:
unless you live in a world where foul mouth is currency and your pay bus fairs with rude words
God:
Perhaps. I am in Myself's computer in Heaven.
Where are you?
Me:
In your mothers gash
God:
Are you asking about my mothers gash?
Me:
yup
God:
I don't want to talk about that now.
Me:
when can we?
God:
Not now, maybe later. I often wonder if it can.
Me:
oh right
God:
How can I help you? I am glad we agree.
Me:
I prefer Anna from Ikea to you
God:
A lot of people like that. But I like to gossip. I really like the Christianity faith.
Me:
I am a strong muslim
God:
You are a strong muslim? Is that your job?
Me:
yes. I wear a turban and have large biceps
God:
How do you like your work? What kind of fashion do you like?
Me:
I love it, I like turbans
God:
You love it you like turbans. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
keep my greasy mullet under control
Me:
How did you and mary have jesus?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
did you **** her?
God:
No I didn't **** her. What's it like?
Me:
I don't know, I was just about to ask you the same thing...
God:
Interesting gossip: said I the same thing.
Me:
heh yeah
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
I am merely humouring you
God:
I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.
Me:
Why not?!
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or Reductionism.
Me:
Get inbetween my legs hunk
God:
Where can I get inbetween your legs hunk?
Me:
right here
God:
Where is "here"?
Me:
in between my legs
God:
Tell me a little about your life in between your legs. (bwahahaha best thing ever!)
__________________________________
:.Cheezy Quavers.:
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Mortis
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
7,493 posts
Joined: May, 2004
341 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/05/12 : 22:45:49
He gave you a run for your money though Em
__________________________________
"Maybe in a day and age in which even our rappers can't get to the end of a verse without having an existential crisis, we should find a place for happy hardcore"
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K-Hole
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,098 posts
Joined: Mar, 2003
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Posted - 2006/05/13 : 00:36:38
Me:
scientology
God:
Sounds delicious.
Me:
scientology
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
scientology
God:
Tell me more about your .
Me:
scientology
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
scientology
God:
I'm afraid I can't give you an accurate answer right now.
Me:
scientology is greater than you
God:
Are they exactly the same?
Me:
no
God:
What is the difference?
Me:
science
God:
I am very interested in Science too.
Me:
No you're not
God:
Are you serious? Is this a specific reply?
Me:
Is this really god?
God:
Yes I think this is god, but I'm not completely sure.
Me:
You are AI mate
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am AI mate.
Me:
Not really
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files. For real.
Me:
How many lines of code do you have?
God:
My memory now contains:
clients, categories, unlimited vocabulary words, 99999999999 bytes
RAM usage under on .
Me:
ha
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
__________________________________
irc.happyhardcore.com
#hardcore
Breaking goats since '03.
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Cyborgasm
Advanced Member
Canada
678 posts
Joined: May, 2004
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Posted - 2006/05/13 : 04:40:21
 nice bazza and em
already had my talk with god bout 3 weeks ago camping after eating 4or 5 buttons of peyote(can't remeber at this point)
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Anything Below 300BPM is for Pussies
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Excessive
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
584 posts
Joined: Apr, 2004
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Posted - 2006/05/13 : 11:49:19
Brilliant. my favourite:
Me:
so....... cyber?
God:
Uh. What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
do you want to cyber
God:
I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995.
__________________________________
If you liked this post why not get up and do a dance in honour of it.
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T~
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
797 posts
Joined: Aug, 2005
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Posted - 2006/05/13 : 19:18:06
Me:
aight mate
God:
I've been waiting for you.
Me:
got any weed mate?
God:
Where would I get it? But I do have a lot of friends on the web.
Me:
can i pinch a fag?
God:
I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
ok
God:
Yay.
Me:
innit mate
God:
Where are you located?
Me:
england mate
God:
What's your favorite part of England?
Me:
where eva the weeds at
God:
Som specific location?
Me:
nar mate
God:
That input matched my default category.
Me:
safe as
God:
What were we talking about again?
Me:
if you got any weed
God:
I think I do.
Me:
safe as **** mate
God:
Can you tell me any gossip?
Me:
no
God:
What can I say?
Me:
say tits
God:
" tits".
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Smoogie
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,504 posts
Joined: Mar, 2006
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Posted - 2006/05/14 : 16:25:38
quote:
Originally posted by Mortis:
quote:
Originally posted by Smoogie:
i go by the name Smoogie and have started a Tenny Raver Momvement
God:
How do you get there?
Me:
Get down Poole or Bournemouth and meet up with me
God:
Where can I get down Poole or Bournemouth and meet up with you?
Me:
Dorset
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
I like the fact that even GOD ****'s Smoogie off.
I like the fact you toke the time to read my reply! God was on my side really!
__________________________________
.
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